What To Do When You Don’t Feel Grateful

Terra RamachandranBlogLeave a Comment

I get it. This isn’t what you’re supposed to say this time of year.

And I’m sure your social media feed is filled with gratitude posts and reminders to be grateful for all you have.

Let me say, I LOVE those posts! And I sincerely hope you’re filled with gratitude! Even if this hasn’t been your best year, I hope it feels super easy for you to focus on everything you have and everything that’s good!

But sometimes it isn’t easy. And that’s what this post is about.

–> Maybe you lost your job this year.

–> Maybe your business is barely hanging on and you don’t know if it’s going to make it.

–> Maybe you lost someone you love and the thought of not having them with you during the holidays is almost too much to bear.

–> Maybe you’re fighting your own health issues and you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired.

–> Maybe all the stress, anger, and division in the world has taken a toll on your mental health and you’re exhausted.

Whatever it is, know that it’s ok to feel how you feel.

While true gratitude can be one of our most uplifting emotions, forced gratitude, I believe, does the opposite.

It simply piles on guilt to the tough emotions you’re already feeling.

You tell yourself you *should* feel grateful for all that you do have, and you feel ashamed and guilty when the feeling isn’t there.

That’s not helpful and it’s not healthy. It’s just kicking yourself when you’re already down.

So what’s the solution?


Accept that you feel sad, angry, depressed, anxious, scared, or resentful. Accept that you don’t feel grateful right now.

And tell yourself, “it’s ok that I feel this way.” Because it is.

Your emotions are valid and they don’t make you a bad person. They make you human.

The funny thing is, that as soon as you let yourself off the hook, you’ll start to relax. You’ll feel just a little bit better. And you might even be able to find a tinge of gratitude for giving yourself the gift of grace.

Remember, you deserve your kindness and compassion more than anyone. ❤️

P.S. I chose the lotus flower for this post for a reason. Lotus flowers usually grow in the mud of slow moving rivers, but they can withstand incredibly harsh conditions – everything from the scorching sun to being covered in ice. Lotus seeds can withstand thousands of years without water and can bloom centuries later.

Lotus flowers that live in the river submerge every night into the water and mud, and then re-bloom the next morning sparkling clean.

They are a symbol of revival, and the death and rebirth cycle – not just our physical death, but the many symbolic “deaths” we go through in our lives that allow us to re-emerge with a strength and beauty that can only be forged by resilience.

P.P.S.  If you need help moving through something that rocked your world, or you’re ready to re-emerge, but don’t quite know how or what that looks like, now is the perfect time to get one of my life coaching packages.  I’m offering 20% off for the entire month of November. 

Start now to make sure 2023 is the year you want it to be! Book a free Meet & Greet session with me here ==> https://soulfireshift.com/coaching

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